[12-1-2007] 13:30 Cork Dublin

Mark Gleeson · 13-01-2007, 23:14

A little late for up to date information

The 13:30 got stuck in Cork station and couldn't pull away, nothing to do with the locomotive or Mk4 coaches

Prize for the first person to figure out why!

packetswitch · 13-01-2007, 23:25

You say not locomotive and not carriages. My powers of logic are telling me it was therefore the fault of the DVT*. Right?

They forgot to turn it on? The cables between the DVT and the locomotive weren't plugged in? The driver got in the wrong end?

* in the interests of those reading this public section of the boards, driving van trailer, aka 'the pointy end', generator van, or whatever. In the case of this train, it (I think?) supplies power for things like lights and heat through the train, and enables the driver to drive when the locomotive is at the back - in current operation, Cork to Dublin, subject to correction, is in this format?

Mark Gleeson · 13-01-2007, 23:35

Train was totally clear of fault. It did make it to Dublin with no passengers later, passengers got the 14:30

The hint is Cork station is on a tight curve, think what that means

packetswitch · 13-01-2007, 23:42

The 'gap' was too big to mind?

Mark Gleeson · 13-01-2007, 23:52

Lets just say the coefficent of friction was not what it should be, think about a train and a sharp bend

Derek Wheeler · 14-01-2007, 00:34

Jaysus Mark, would you just say it and be done with it. We've known since Friday night.

Mark Gleeson · 14-01-2007, 00:37

Its more fun this way

packetswitch · 14-01-2007, 00:49

I have a picture in my head of the train separating and half of it rolling towards the tunnel out of Cork station and the other half creaking backwards...that couldn't be it?

Mark Gleeson · 14-01-2007, 01:15

There is a curve, train wheels squeal so you deal with it through grease, won't take much to figure it out now

MrX · 15-01-2007, 11:40

A leaf was detected between cork and mallow and a crack team of engineers with spatulas were sent out to scrape it off?

Thomas J Stamp · 15-01-2007, 11:53

The train ran over Craig Doyle, his blood caused the train wheels to slip badly whilst his bones mangled the traction unit.

Meanwhile, his eyeballs shot out through the floor of the cab and impacted into the genitals of the driver causing him to shout "Oh me balls". This awakened a grumpy Badger from his Winter sleep, and he went on a rampage biting everyone he met, including Sean Murtage, a hapless fellow from Skibbereen who was just taking his consitutional that day.

Sean developed TB. He took to his bed and starrted suffering from delusions. These included quoting numbers which, happily for Mary, his wife, were the winning Euro Lotto Millions. With the €100 million he won Sean went to visit Aidnan Cashoggii and rented out a private army, came back to Ireland, deposed the State and set up a military junta. Many executions followed and by decree Matt Cooper has been established as the Official Religion of the State.

Much weeping and gnashing of teeth developed, whcih was handy for the dental trade. Using their new influence over the country the Dentists staged a coup, deposing the dictator Murtagh and amputating his mouth. the Dentists then performed un-nesssissaty corrective tratment on everyone, including strainge and weird epesodes of Orthodonics on the enderly and the lame. Meanwhile, using what little power his had left, Murtagh staged a rebellion from Mayo, but was utterly defeated in battle in Nielstown, where nobody noticed anything.

The dentists went on to rule for a thousand years untill they got fed up and went to live an an island somwhere with my cat.

Is that what happend?

Was it?

Was it?

Was it?

Mark Gleeson · 15-01-2007, 12:25

Suprisingly the first sentence is the closest anyone has got to the real reason

Craig Doyle was nowhere to be seen anywhere

Thomas J Stamp · 15-01-2007, 12:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mark Gleeson

Craig Doyle was nowhere to be seen anywhere

That's because he was so mashed up.

2Funki4Wheelz · 15-01-2007, 14:11

Quote:

Originally Posted by Thomas J Stamp

That's because he was so mashed up.

And is only identifiable by the dental records of his dazzling 100watt smile.
Ah Craig

Thomas J Stamp · 15-01-2007, 14:41

Quote:

Suprisingly the first sentence is the closest anyone has got to the real reason

What do I win?

packetswitch · 15-01-2007, 15:40

A framed, signed photograph of Craig Doyle. Oh yeah.

Mark Gleeson · 15-01-2007, 15:44

If you subsitute the blood for something else you get the answer

Thought people would have worked it out

Thomas J Stamp · 15-01-2007, 15:55

Something else.......?

The Ugandan Navy on manouvers in the South Pacific?

Hordes of Wilderbeats gliding majesticly on the African Plains?

A large bottle of Dettol getting drunk in a pub?

Seventeen Spanish Tomatoes kidnapping a Japanses Tourist and holding her to ransom in Moore Street?

A large envelope kicking a small child in the face on The Angelus?

Global Warming resulting in the Earth Spinning out of Control and into the back of my Car whilst I'm waiting for an old lady to cross a zebra crossing?

Mark Gleeson · 15-01-2007, 16:27

Ok the story goes

Cork station is on a tight curve, we all know the crazy gap to the platform as a result

They grease the side of the rails to the wheels don't squeel also saves on wheel wear.

Story is someone got a little over eager with the grease. Wheels go round and round and the train don't move much

War broke out as the blame as pinned on the right department

kilman · 15-01-2007, 16:34

So the train was like old coyote chasing road runner. He'd go over the cliff and keep running but didn't go anywhere!-well except down.
Jaysus, how much grease would you to apply to a wheel to cause this!? Perhaps the IE canteen in Cork station had plenty from the morning fry and the eager worker remembering the reduce,reuse,recycle mantra (over)did his bit for the world.

13-01-2007, 23:14	#1
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	[12-1-2007] 13:30 Cork Dublin A little late for up to date information The 13:30 got stuck in Cork station and couldn't pull away, nothing to do with the locomotive or Mk4 coaches Prize for the first person to figure out why!

15-01-2007, 11:53	#11
Thomas J Stamp Chairman/Publicity Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: The Home of Hurling Posts: 2,708	The train ran over Craig Doyle, his blood caused the train wheels to slip badly whilst his bones mangled the traction unit. Meanwhile, his eyeballs shot out through the floor of the cab and impacted into the genitals of the driver causing him to shout "Oh me balls". This awakened a grumpy Badger from his Winter sleep, and he went on a rampage biting everyone he met, including Sean Murtage, a hapless fellow from Skibbereen who was just taking his consitutional that day. Sean developed TB. He took to his bed and starrted suffering from delusions. These included quoting numbers which, happily for Mary, his wife, were the winning Euro Lotto Millions. With the €100 million he won Sean went to visit Aidnan Cashoggii and rented out a private army, came back to Ireland, deposed the State and set up a military junta. Many executions followed and by decree Matt Cooper has been established as the Official Religion of the State. Much weeping and gnashing of teeth developed, whcih was handy for the dental trade. Using their new influence over the country the Dentists staged a coup, deposing the dictator Murtagh and amputating his mouth. the Dentists then performed un-nesssissaty corrective tratment on everyone, including strainge and weird epesodes of Orthodonics on the enderly and the lame. Meanwhile, using what little power his had left, Murtagh staged a rebellion from Mayo, but was utterly defeated in battle in Nielstown, where nobody noticed anything. The dentists went on to rule for a thousand years untill they got fed up and went to live an an island somwhere with my cat. Is that what happend? Was it? Was it? Was it? __________________ We are the passengers

15-01-2007, 15:55	#18
Thomas J Stamp Chairman/Publicity Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: The Home of Hurling Posts: 2,708	Something else.......? The Ugandan Navy on manouvers in the South Pacific? Hordes of Wilderbeats gliding majesticly on the African Plains? A large bottle of Dettol getting drunk in a pub? Seventeen Spanish Tomatoes kidnapping a Japanses Tourist and holding her to ransom in Moore Street? A large envelope kicking a small child in the face on The Angelus? Global Warming resulting in the Earth Spinning out of Control and into the back of my Car whilst I'm waiting for an old lady to cross a zebra crossing? __________________ We are the passengers

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13-01-2007, 23:25	#2
packetswitch Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 216	You say not locomotive and not carriages. My powers of logic are telling me it was therefore the fault of the DVT. Right? They forgot to turn it on? The cables between the DVT and the locomotive weren't plugged in? The driver got in the wrong end? in the interests of those reading this public section of the boards, driving van trailer, aka 'the pointy end', generator van, or whatever. In the case of this train, it (I think?) supplies power for things like lights and heat through the train, and enables the driver to drive when the locomotive is at the back - in current operation, Cork to Dublin, subject to correction, is in this format?

13-01-2007, 23:35	#3
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	Train was totally clear of fault. It did make it to Dublin with no passengers later, passengers got the 14:30 The hint is Cork station is on a tight curve, think what that means

13-01-2007, 23:42	#4
packetswitch Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 216	The 'gap' was too big to mind?

13-01-2007, 23:52	#5
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	Lets just say the coefficent of friction was not what it should be, think about a train and a sharp bend

14-01-2007, 00:34	#6
Derek Wheeler Registered user Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Kildare Posts: 1,555	Jaysus Mark, would you just say it and be done with it. We've known since Friday night.

14-01-2007, 00:37	#7
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	Its more fun this way

14-01-2007, 00:49	#8
packetswitch Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 216	I have a picture in my head of the train separating and half of it rolling towards the tunnel out of Cork station and the other half creaking backwards...that couldn't be it?

14-01-2007, 01:15	#9
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	There is a curve, train wheels squeal so you deal with it through grease, won't take much to figure it out now

15-01-2007, 11:40	#10
MrX Really Regular Poster Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 585	A leaf was detected between cork and mallow and a crack team of engineers with spatulas were sent out to scrape it off?

15-01-2007, 12:25	#12
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	Suprisingly the first sentence is the closest anyone has got to the real reason Craig Doyle was nowhere to be seen anywhere

15-01-2007, 15:40	#16
packetswitch Member Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 216	A framed, signed photograph of Craig Doyle. Oh yeah.

15-01-2007, 15:44	#17
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	If you subsitute the blood for something else you get the answer Thought people would have worked it out

15-01-2007, 16:27	#19
Mark Gleeson Technical Officer Join Date: Dec 2005 Location: Coach C, Seat 33 Posts: 12,669	Ok the story goes Cork station is on a tight curve, we all know the crazy gap to the platform as a result They grease the side of the rails to the wheels don't squeel also saves on wheel wear. Story is someone got a little over eager with the grease. Wheels go round and round and the train don't move much War broke out as the blame as pinned on the right department

15-01-2007, 16:34	#20
kilman Regular Poster Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 42	So the train was like old coyote chasing road runner. He'd go over the cliff and keep running but didn't go anywhere!-well except down. Jaysus, how much grease would you to apply to a wheel to cause this!? Perhaps the IE canteen in Cork station had plenty from the morning fry and the eager worker remembering the reduce,reuse,recycle mantra (over)did his bit for the world.